Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Hips

It's necessary that I start this post with a bit of background information. Upon our first visit back to the states after moving to Hong Kong (last April, to give you some time reference), I was excited to hear what was playing on American Top 40 radio stations. I felt so out of the loop, not knowing the most recent Kelly Clarkson or Britney Spears release. One of the little gems I heard, contained a ridiculous chorus that went something like:

(Growly Male Voice with crap-tastic rap in the background): "If a girl's hot, you know she's hot, 'cause she's hot just like her mama....If a girl's hot you know she's hot--she's hot just like her mama..." "Where'd you get your hot, hot looks?"

(Whiny Female Voice with the crap-tastic rap continuing in the background): "I got them from my mama... I got them from my mama..."

Needless to say, it was bad. Really, really bad. So bad it was hilarious.

So, with that little bit of nonsense out of the way, today I went to the corner store to get my daily lottery ticket, and upon entering the shop, I got thoroughly looked up and down by a visibly inebriated man in the process of buying a large bottle of Jack Daniels.

"Blippss....," I heard him mutter.

I looked him straight in the eye, and gave him a clear look implying that if he had something to say regarding my body, he better say it straight to me.

"Hips," I heard him say a little more clearly. "You got nice hips, lady."

Without hesitation and perfectly straight-faced, I declared, "I got them from my mama."

It took everything in my power not to bust a smile. The station attendant was cracking-up, though, so maybe he got the reference.

I was going to track down the video online and post it here, but I don't think it's crabby-rangoon appropriate. I'll let you fine folks hunt it down yourself. It's sure to be a classic someday. An oldie, but a goody, for sure.

***--------Ok, folks, forgive me. After I finished this post I went and looked up the video, and decided it was too funny not to post. SO, here it is in all it's glory. Again, please forgive me for subjecting you to this music video. And, PLEASE NOTE--viewer discretion advised. It's really, really stupid. Don't say I didn't warn you.--------***

8 comments:

Jane said...

That post was...hilarious! Brilliant!

Speaking of Kelly Clarkson, though...I had a dream last night that I made it into the top 12 on American Idol. I was SO disappointed when I woke up and it was all a big fat LIE. But your blog post just totally cheered me up again.

Beth said...

I love it! I can't believe you at some point listened close enough to the song to have that retort just sitting on the tip of your tongue!! :)

P.S. I thought the video should be renamed "Booty" instead of Hips b/c I saw much more of that than hips...this will not be replacing "I Like Big Butts" anytime soon.

kjl said...

Wow...that makes me really glad I don't listen to much top 40! That was ridiculously bad.

Dorothy said...

Well if you like that song you probably like, "Humps". My favorite line is: "What you gon' do with all that junk? All that junk inside your trunk?" You can do the math on what the "trunk" and the "junk" is. It is quite catchy, but I wouldn't advise singing it in the a store parking lot.

Food Critic said...

Genius!

Lori said...

Ha! I love it! Very witty of you.

Dani said...

You are my hero.

James said...

Well done. That is the funniest story I've heard in a long time!